What can Ram teach us on mental health?
A 14000 year old hero has valuable lessons for today's mental health challenges
“The most enduring lessons on mental health come from our epics! Shri Ram from Ramayana through his struggles is an ideal hero to teach us mental fortitude”
Prof. Shukla was arguing energetically in the debate on mental wellness. The talk was on the silent pandemic of mental ill health that is infiltrating our homes and communities.
Later during lunch, in a small huddle, an ardent fan asked the professor
“Today we have wars, job layoffs, technology shifts and health scares. In such a stressful environment, mental wellness is always a challenge. How can Ramayana which is a 14 thousand old epic be relevant to this issue?”
Prof. Shukla chuckled and took a small bite of the dessert.
He then went on -
“The three keys to healthy mental state are awareness, acceptance and action.
All these three elements are aptly demonstrated by Ram in his journey from being a crown prince to the King of people’s hearts.”
Awareness - who are you?
“If you don’t know who you are, the world will tell you who you are. You may then feel disillusioned or stifled with that identity!”
One of the biggest reasons for mental ill-health is a misplaced understanding of who one is. Either the person feels deeply inferior and wallows in self-pity or feels an illusion of superiority which the world disagrees with.
Ram saw the crown as a duty and not desire.
The crown price Ram was disappointed when he learnt that he would no more be the king. But he was not dejected because he knew who he was. In his mind, he was deeply aware of his duties as a son, as a husband and as a crown prince.
He had all the knowledge, strength and backing to fight his father and the army. In fact, his mother Kaushalya, his sibling Lakshman and even Guru Vashishta tried to persuade him to reject his father’s ask.
But Ram was aware of the consequences. His father Dashrath was the King and as a son, if Ram went against Dashrath’s promise, then as a kingdom, no one would respect the King’s words.
Lastly, after Ravan was killed, Ram could have captured Lanka as his kingdom. Ram was aware that Lanka was a Rakshasa region and so, he instated Vibhishan as the regent and walked away with Sita, Lakshman and others to Ayodhya.
Today how many of us have this clarity? A wave of viral videos swings our behaviors from one extreme to the other!
Acceptance - how is the situation?
One cannot change anything unless one accepts it!
As we struggle with awareness, we lose touch with reality or harbor illusions about it. Since we cannot see things as they are, we expect things to happen the way we desire. When things don’t turn out our way, we feel disappointed. Over time, repeat disappointments lead us to dejection, then resignation and ultimately isolation.
Once Ram had taken the decision to leave, he did not spend time arguing with himself or others about it. With acceptance, his mind was now focused on figuring out the next steps. He leveraged the exile to spend time with great Rishis and gathering wisdom which he would otherwise have had no chance to imbibe.
He harbored no malice for his brother Bharat or queen mother Kaikeyi and therefore when persuaded to come back, he did not waver from his chosen path. By accepting his journey, he embraced it and therefore become even more admirable.
Likewise, when he finally met Sita after the battle, both were overwhelmed with emotion. But, he knew that the armies and the citizens were watching and there would have been doubts on Sita’s character after being in captivity.
He, therefore, had a harsh conversation with Sita alluding to her character in captivity and she was equally fierce in her responses. The conversation was heart-wrenching, but it shows how Ram had deftly read the questions in people’s minds and accepted it as part of human psyche. Eventually, it was the audience that goaded Ram to accept her and not question her integrity.
Do we have the courage to accept what is right in front of us? We rather expend all our energies in fighting the inevitable and then complain that life is unfair.
Action - what can I do about it?
“You cannot hope to make progress in areas where you have taken no action!” - Epictetus
We love to engage in arguments and discussions rather than act. It is more comforting to wail and wallow in self-pity than it is to wrestle with life.
Ram was aware and accepted his journey, but he also took action where needed.
When Sita was abducted, he could have just given up on her. After all, he was an able, handsome man and could have earned another wife? He could have even walked back to his kingdom.
Yet, he chose to act. He strained every sinew of his body to find her. In that journey, he met others who were struggling - Sugriv, Hanuman, Angad. Instead of giving up, he used his skills and powers to guide, inspire and save them.
Ram was a forest dweller with no kingdom - just a dedicated brother and bow-arrow. Being in exile, he could not even get army from Ayodhya or Mithila.
So, what could he do? He inspired an army of Vaanaras - forest dwellers that scoured the earth to locate Sita. The same army of Vaanaras- who had no weapons fought with their bare hands, sticks and stones against an even bigger, well-equipped army of Rakshasas in a foreign land across the ocean.
Of what use is all the education, wealth and comforts if we cannot decide and act? Endless analysis and arguments with no action stifles the mind.
Prof Shukla ended his long commentary with this line that hit home the main point -
“You see, we wait for a savior when there is none but the one staring at us from the mirror.”
जा पर कृपा राम की होई, ता पर कृपा करहिं सब कोई…Actually means this about learning Ram 😊